At least that is what it feels like.
Coming to Denmark, or generally going abroad during my studies, was not something I planned. Especially when I started my studies in 2010. I didn't really see myself as a person who studies abroad, I don't know why. I felt like there were certain kinds of people who become exchange students: they who want to meet new people and party abroad, or they who long for adventures since they are bored in their home country.
I never had the need to go abroad. I like to meet new people, but not so bad that I will take an exchange year and move from my home country, family and friends. And I certainly wasn't bored back home, I was busy with studies, work, student organizations, movies and my friends.
One of the main reasons I started considering an exchange year was to have a chance to study something I love. One of my friends told me about some university courses online in Sweden I could take during my studies, and then I realized how different some courses can be from the ones back home. Especially courses in film, which is my main interest. Since I can study film only as a minor at the University of Helsinki, and I have taken almost all the courses there is, I needed to find a way to continue studying film. Preferably some different kind of courses that I have taken in Helsinki. When I started studying Nordic literature and heard about other people going abroad, at times I considered it too. I did not really feel the excitement or a need to study literature abroad.
Like, eh. Why would I do that?
But a couple of years ago I started thinking about my chances to study film abroad, and I couldn't resist the thought anymore. To get a chance to study more film studies, abroad, with new approaches and new people interested in film? I thought about moving to London, Sweden, France. I thought about the different possibilities and chances I could get. New people I could meet who love film, and new, inspiring teachers. Yeah, suddenly I was really excited. I didn't go abroad to hang out in another country for a year, I went abroad to broaden my perspective about something I truly love.
So why Denmark? Well, through Nordic literature I had an easier way to go the Nordic countries. I also loved Danish series, had already learned some basic Danish and it wasn't too far from home. Now I can't even describe how satisfied and blessed I am choosing this country, this town, this university, these courses, these teachers, these classmates. I can't imagine myself being anywhere else, and I am seriously considering coming back here, to finish my Master's. I mean,
how_cool_would_that_be_?
Very.
But what about those hard choices? Well, deciding to come to Aarhus was a choice. Not a very hard one, since it would be only 4-5 months, I would study something awesome and I didn't really know what to do after my Bachelor's.
It wasn't easy to decide to move here, away from my family, my boyfriend, and all the things I were used to. Even though I like to see my family more often, we have had many phone and Skype calls. I can feel their support. Every time something great and amazing happens, I call them. Every time I feel insecure about things here or my future, I call them. I get all the help I need, and they make me feel like I did the best decision to come here, which makes me feel even happier.
My boyfriend also supported me all the way, and it doesn't feel like this time has changed our relationship to something unfixable. It has actually made it stronger - I trust us more than ever before, I am so very grateful for his understanding and support, and I couldn't love him more right now. To stay here is not only a huge thing for me, I can't forget that.
Now I have one month left, but the decisions do not end here. My next step is to decide where I will do my Master's degree, but at times I feel that I made the choice already. I really love Medievidenskap, C-linie here in Aarhus. I have not found anything similar back home, I already know some of the teachers and students, I feel like home here and I never imagined myself being this happy and this interested in studying. And I never imagined being so excited to come back.
It's easy to see myself back here again next year and stay for at least 1,5 years. But when the time comes, it will not be as easy. To again have two homes which I travel between. And what happens then? Will I stay here or go back? Maybe move to another country? Will I continue having a long-distance boyfriend, or will we move together? What happens when he is going abroad in five years? Will I still have my friends from back home, will it be the same when I return? Are we really that close?
I really hope so.
I guess I just have to follow my heart. It brought me here, to one of the best experiences I have had in my 24-years. But at the same time I left a piece of it in Finland.
Ei kommentteja:
Lähetä kommentti